


Love Lost

by PaigeWillows



Category: Descendants (Disney Movies)
Genre: Bittersweet Ending, M/M, benlos, jaylos, sad fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:54:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24479032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaigeWillows/pseuds/PaigeWillows
Summary: Carlos remembers the love he lost.
Relationships: Ben/Carlos de Vil, Jay/Carlos de Vil
Comments: 1
Kudos: 25





	Love Lost

Carlos De Vil sat alone in the graveyard silently listening to the birds and cleaning off his headstone. It took everything in him to stop crying but he felt more tears coming anyway. All he could do was remember, remember the man he loved, and what he meant to him. All the good times, the bad times, and everything in between. It was a bittersweet feeling. How do you move on from the one who got away in the worst way possible? The one who died before you could get married? The one who meant the whole world to you? All Carlos felt was guilt. He loved Ben with his whole heart but now he was gone. “Carlos… Come on Babe, we’re gonna be late.” Jay called frowning at his lover who sat grieving his former love. Jay loved Carlos but he knew his heart never fully belonged to him. He didn’t mind but his heartbroken every time the nightmares came and he called out for a man who wasn’t there. Dusting himself off Carlos wiped his eyes and got in the car with Jay. It was painfully silent but neither of them wanted to break it. Carlos just looked out the window remembering it all. Every beautiful and painful detail.

Ben came up to Carlos with a bouquet of roses in hand beaming. Carlos gave his best friend and crush an odd look. “Who are those for,” Carlos asked curiously. Ben was the overly romantic type. He loved to make everything fairytale perfect. It was utter bliss most of the time but sometimes could get a little annoying. Ben just beamed at him with that smile that broke his heart and mended it all in the same beat.

“You of course. Carlos, will you go out on a date with me?” Ben asked hopefully, the twinkle in his eyes so bright it could have blinded Carlos. Bubbles of joy filled the monochromatic boy as he launched himself onto Ben hugging him tightly, not wanting to let go. 

“Yes! Oh God Yes!” Carlos laughed happily pulling Ben down into a surprisingly soft, peck on the lips before stealing the roses from him and smelling them. That giddy and overwhelming joy filling his chest was like an echo now, hollow knowing how beautiful this memory was but bitter with knowing he didn’t appreciate it all enough while he could. 

The two went out to eat at Tiana’s Place, the best place in town. Ben insisted on paying and getting Carlos everything he wanted. He was kind of a spoiled rich kid but never let that go to his head. He liked spending his money on other people. Carlos still remembers the piece of triple chocolate cake he ordered for dessert, Ben reaching over to wipe some frosting off his bottom lip and taste it. It made his heart flutter and his face heat up embarrassed. Carlos can’t help but smile at this memory in its purity. 

Ben and Carlos had been dating for a couple of months when Ben pulled out a ring box surprising Carlos. He still remembers the feeling of his heart-stopping when he sees it. That moment of pure shock and surprise. Thankfully it wasn’t an engagement ring but a promise ring. A promise that they would get married someday and that Ben would be there for him always. Carlos played with the ring on his finger as Jay drove the car to Mal and Evie’s, mind still dipped in memories.

It was the first time they had seen each other naked. They decided to go with some friends to the lake and they skinny-dipped. That rush of blood and excitement seeing every inch of Ben’s built form peeling layer after layer of clothing off. It was a sexual tension Carlos felt only a few times in his life. Ben caught him staring and came over to help him undress with that beaming smile that could light up the night brighter than the moon. They ran hand in hand toward the lake, taking that leap together. As the ice-cold water shocked his lungs Carlos couldn’t have felt freer. They floated together, kissing under the sunset as it was getting late. The way Ben bit his lip wanting more but holding himself back for Carlos’s sake was something he still remembers the taste of. The taste of his lips, tongue, and teeth. Always minty fresh in some ways but with this uniqueness to Ben. The way their mouths moved perfectly in sync and came together full of love and a little bit of lust. Carlos bit his lip at this memory shifting uncomfortably knowing that his new love sat beside him while he longed for another pair of lips that he would never kiss again.

It was two years into their relationship and both of them were in college now. The pressure was getting to them. It turned into an argument about the stupidest thing. No matter how mad they were with each other at the time they still went to bed, swaddled in each other’s arms. Ben taught him that love really is unconditional, even at your worst love should come first. He reached over and took Jay’s free hand rubbing his thumb over his knuckles sweetly. He loved Jay. He really did. But it just wasn’t the same. Ben was his true love. And he was gone.

Now comes the lump that hits his throat as they hit a pothole and his grip on Jay’s hand gets tighter. That phone call from Ben’s parents. They had been together for four years, graduation was on the horizon. Ben was on his way home when he got t-boned by another car. A Drunk driver. He was in critical condition. Carlos raced to the hospital. They had Ben hooked up to monitors and machines. His heart was breaking as the fear set in. Ben took his hand while cried. Carlos started crying again now in the car, silently weeping as the pain became too much. He clung to Ben’s hand. “Please don’t leave me, Ben. You gotta fight for me. Please don’t go.”

“I’ll never leave you.” Ben smiled weakly as the monitor began to slow. The team rushed in and pushed Carlos wailing out of the room. It was seventeen painful minutes later that Ben was pronounced Dead. The lump burst in Carlos’s throat and a sob rattled out as wave after wave of feeling came back to him. He was never going to be over it. It was better some days. The pain was easier to bear. But not today. Today it hurt as raw as the day he died. 

“Baby, It’s okay.” Jay cooed trying to calm him as he parked. Evie and Mal stood in the doorway waiting for them. Carlos couldn’t bring himself to move. Everything hurt. He didn’t realize he was having a panic attack until he hyperventilated himself unconscious. 

“Hey…” Ben spoke softly wiping his cheeks smiling that oh so gorgeous smile.

“Am I dead?” Carlos asked numbly looking at Ben hopelessly. Ben shook his head.

“I don’t have long but remember I love you. I am always with you and it’s okay to move on.” Ben spoke softly holding him tightly. All too soon it was gone. Ben was gone again. Carlos woke up in Jay’s arms and buried his face into his chest.

“For a second we thought we were going to lose you, babe.” Jay fretted holding him tightly. Carlos shook his head and let out the pain he had been holding on for too long. His friends watched as he unraveled. He would move on. For Ben. For Jay. For himself. But today. Today, he would just rub that promise ring and know Ben was with him.


End file.
